Reasoning with Women

"Reasoning with a woman is impossible."

"It's like … Well, reasoning with a woman is like sitting down to a friendly game of dice. Only the woman refuses to acknowledge the basic bloody rules of the game. A man, he'll cheat you - but he'll do it honestly. He'll use loaded dice, so that you think you're losing by chance. And if you aren't clever enough to spot what he's doing, then maybe he deserves to take your coin. And that's that.

"A woman, though, she'll sit down to that same game and she'll smoke, and act like she's going to play. Only when it's her turn to throw, she'll toss a pair of her own dice that are blank on all six sides. Not a single pip showing. She'll inspect her trow, then she'll look up at you and say, 'Clearly I just won.'

"Now, you'll scratch your head and look at the dice. Then you'll look up at her, then down at the dice again. 'But there aren't any pops on these dice,' you'll say.

" 'Yes there are,' she'll say. 'And both dice rolled a one.' "

" 'That's exactly the number you need to win,' you'll say.' "

" 'What a coincidence,' she'll reply, then begin to scoop up your coins. And you'll sit there, trying to wrap your head about what just happened. And you'll realize something. A pair of ones isn't the winning throw! Not when ou threw a six on your turn. That means she needed a pair of twos insead! Excitedly, you'll explain what you've discovered. Only then, do you know what she'll do?"

"Then she'll reach over and rub the blank faces of her dice and then with a perfectly straight face she'll say, 'I'm sorry, there was a spot of dirt on the dice, clearly you can see they actually came up as twos!" And she'll believe it, she'll bloody believe it."

"Only that's not the end of it, she scoops up all of your coins and then every other woman in the room will come over and congratulate her on throwing that pair of twos! The more you complain, the more of those bloody women will join the argument, you'll be outnumbered in a moment each of those women will explain to you how those dice clearly read twos, and how you really need to stop behaving like a child. Even the prudish woman who has hated your woman from birth - sice your woman's granny stole the other woman's granny's honeycake recipe when they were both maids - that woman will side against you."

"By the time they are done, you'll be left with no coin, several lists' worth of errands to run and what clothing to wear and a splitting headache. You'll sit there and stare at the table and begin to wonder, just maybe, if those dice didn't era twos after all. If only to preserve what's left of your sanity. That's what it's like to reason with a woman, I tell you." 

-Robert Jordan, Wheel of Time: The Gathering Storm

Resurrection

I have been neglecting this vocal outlet for quite some time as I try and adjust to life in the city of brotherly love (not) my new job and being 3k miles away from everything I know and care about. The SC2 blogging will also continue but under a different guise as I try and re-learn this game of starcraft but as a zerg. Coming soon though I have to give a series of post updates about my life for hire and I have a few things to get off my chest including my tretease on women, Palestinian's bitching all the time and US Citizens not understanding wtf is happening, the crazy way we have introductions and their misconceptions, and i'm sure to think of other things by the time I start writing this. SO as of this moment, I consider this blog resurrected!